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If you want to go against that trend, one of you will almost certainly change perspective. You might need to trade missionary lessons for research on her part, and we can suggest less scary resources. As a non member you can not take her to the celestial kingdom to live with God and get your own worlds to populate with her. I always felt guilty for feeling bored, depressed or anxious about spending so much time apart from him, but thanks all, for making me realize that I am not alone. Wonderful memories made for both of us. She has opened my eyes to many parts of our national culture that are not in harmony with righteousness. A Mormon wife will also want to bring the kids along, and that should be discussed and decided before marriage and before kids. You must either really love blue balls, or else she is not a real deal Mormon girl. There is no freedom to think, no freedom to speak your mind, and no freedom to do anything that 'the brethren' say not to. Fall in love, learn, make some mistakes, laugh, serve other people, reproduce, and let the whole story start again.
Toxic is the right word. Get her to explain what she believes, and how it might differ from her church. Do you and your girlfriend have any kind of plan for how you're going to manage your relationship while you're both in residency. And here's a fabulous musical explanation of how the church came to franchise it's ecclesiastical services and doctrinal instruction in a process known as correlation. You will be expected to condone but not attend events in the temple to which you will not be granted access. Righteous love does conquer all but in some cases it takes a lot longer than we are willing to wait. Good luck to you. OP Have you seen the Brother Jake videos. That is the shit storm on the road ahead of you.